Word Problem Anxiety

BART!

By Source, Fair use, https://en.wikipedia.org/w/index.php?curid=42022551

The Simpsons's creators hit the nail on the head when they came up with this gem. Bart Simpson struggles with a word problem on a test. This was me. Bart probably had the "exam dream" for years after formal education was over; I know I did. After about 40 years they didn't occur anymore.

Pennsylvania Place Names

A previous post extolled the rich character of women's names in Pennsylvania. This state also has hundreds of the more curious place names ever heard. I bring you a sampling.

Coal mining has left its mark in the countryside via numerous town names. When there was more than one mine in an area they would all be given the same name with a number appended. Most of the mines are closed yet the names have stuck. So today you could reside in Alison One or Alison Two. Or Continental Three--perhaps Continental 1 and 2 have faded into obscurity? There's Filbert One, Montour Ten, Thompson Two, Tower Hill One and Two. The name Lock Three comes from operations on the Monongahela River.

Other coal and coke legacies are Minersville, Smoketown, Smokeless, Cokeburg, Miners Mills, Poland Mines, Grindstone, and the absolute worst--don't ever move here--Pitt Gas! Imagine the humiliation at a dignified gathering when introducing yourself as Bob Smith from Pitt Gas, Pennsylvania. And I would choose Smokeless over Smoketown!

Cokeburg, Pennsylvania in 1910

You could live in Indiana, California, or Wyoming. Not the states; they are all towns in Pennsylvania.

You would never spell out this place on an envelope: S.N.P.J. It stands for Slovenska Narodna Podporna Jednota. Translation: Slovene National Benefit Society. Yeah.  S.N.P.J, Pennsylvania.

Then there are the peculiar, intriguing places: Bird in Hand, Trucksville, Pillow, Burnt Cabins, Fearnot, Camp Jo-Ann, Eighty-Four, Tarrs, Library, Snowball Gate, Turkeyfoot, Turkeytown, the cute Daisytown, and what must be a lovely place, Scenery Hill. I would build a house there, but not in Low Hill. There are two places called Dry Tavern. And is it really such a large place that you must designate your residence as Upper Peanut or Lower Peanut?

Then we have the grand prize Pennsylvania place name that mortified me as a teenager: Intercourse.  I thought I'd rather die than have to give THAT as my hometown.  Driving through there made me eternally grateful my Dad grew up in the not-so-weird towns of Perryopolis and Star Junction!

George Washington's Mill, Perryopolis Pennsylvania

Love Those Pennsylvania Names

My First Grade Class, Northridge, CA, 1961

1950s and 60s Southern California's San Fernando Valley was pretty much a white bread culture.  Our neighborhoods and schools, unlike my children's now, were not filled with bright Vietnamese--Koreans-- Indians or with Somali refugees escaping unspeakable horrors.  There was a thimble-full of immigrant families in our area: 1 Finnish, 2 from India, and a girl from Japan in my 4th grade class. 

There were a few of us though, with complicated names inherited from immigrant grandparents.  No one had ever heard the surname Bubnash.  No one could pronounce it right on the first try.  Or the second.   Or the third.   Same for my friends surnamed Letizia, Muchowski, Shusett, Milkovich.  I envied all the Wilsons and Rowes and Meyers and Rogers and Sims with plainer English names.

Pennsylvania is an entirely different story.  The draw of industry and coal mining around the turn of the 20th century attracted hundreds of thousands of Eastern and Southern European families with tongue-twister names. 

George, John, Andrew, Michael Bubnas
Pennsylvania 1900

Because my Dad is from deeply ethnic PA I know a lot of people there, so I scan the newspaper and obituaries online to keep up with events.  And the most amazing surnames pop out, and I love every one of them.  No plain vanilla names allowed here.   These are Starbuck's Cinnamon Dolce Crème Frappuccino names, with creamy milk, sweet cinnamon flavored syrup with the homey flavors of butter and brown sugar  topped with sweetened whipped cream and cinnamon sprinkles!

Here's a list of amazingly rich women's names I've collected.  Try saying them out loud!

Mary M. "Marge" Sintich Plovock Bozek
Anna Smertka Sedory
Eva Stanchak Stuckslager
Josephine Suchta Bialousz
Sophia Mscarko Sesco Shwallon
Mary Swancigar Bokat Repko Cihon
Frances Marianne Sozonovich Zuchowski
Hermina A. "Minnie" Pokorny Yasenosky
Helen M. Veshinfsky Fasulkey
Bruna C. Baroni Boldyzar and her mom: Carolina Bugaloni Baroni
Mary Ann Vrabel Latsnic Christoff
Palma Paris Pro
Alta Mae 'Curly' Moats Pidpyryhora
Josephine J. Fiffick Smorada
Bronsilia Bertha Tomalski Vinesky
Anna Shernisky Skrypak
Mildred Honeygosky Presley
Anna Krivenra Yurkncincoz
Irene E. Skovran Guziak Kowalczyk
Helen Szvitih Zundel
Janet Ivadell Junk Sedlock
Elizabeth Gallik Palgutta
Anna Hantosh Bootz Horwat
Mildred Inez LeCorchick Tworzydlo
Elva Noskey Noschese Pacione Grubbs
Kzenia Stefansky Wanzilak